09/02/2026: Wishing Wells

It’s hard to find worth in what you do when the world is so quick to judge you. Whether it’s a denial of self-growth or a disregard of the passion you put into the world through a beloved art form, there will always be resentment and indifference. So sometimes I wonder: What’s the point in improving or doing what you love?

They say that artists—and creatives in general—are sensitive, and after all my personal ups and downs, I can say that I agree with this statement. One day, this can mean that you’re in tune with what you feel and what you want to say; on a different day, you can feel like the biggest imposter and failure on the planet. I think that’s where I’m sitting today.

I had a great talk with a friend a couple days ago about finding your people, your support group for your good and your bad times, the ones who truly care and never judge, those you can always lean on and be yourself around, and we concluded that we both have very few of those in our respective circles. Why is it so hard for people we care about to cheer us on when we thrive and commiserate with us when we feel alone, like we’ve bent over backwards to do for them countless times when something good or bad happens in their lives? Why can’t we ever feel good about wanting to better ourselves, and why can’t we get rewarded more often for chasing our dreams? 

I don’t think people realize how much we take to heart as humans. We remember when people aren’t there for us, and we also remember all the polite rejections of our hard work. And all these things stack and pile up and up and up until we give up the hard fight of being authentic and give up our dreams altogether. If I had a coin for all the hardships I’ve endured creatively and emotionally, I could fill so many wishing wells. 

And yet, I still can’t give up on myself or my work. Maybe there was a time when I came to that crossroads, where I could choose whether I was going to live the easy-boring-practical life, or the difficult-exciting-unconventional one. Maybe on that road I could have chosen the widely accepted and least resistant path, and maybe I could have made a decent living for myself. But that fork in the road is long gone, and for better or worse, I’m on my chosen path, setbacks, triumphs, and all.